On the Outside, Looking In
by gnbrules
Summary: Two people who loved him look in on his new life, his prophecy fulfilled.


**On the Outside, Looking In**

**Summary: Two people who loved him look in on his new life, his prophecy fulfilled. **

It's the rumors that have brought her here on a cold November night. Of course, she'd thought of this moment for years, quietly yearned for him even as she lived her life, even as she gave into the idea that part of her would _always _belong to him. But she was still becoming cookies and he too had his own destiny beyond her. It wasn't their time. But then the rumors reached her - that he'd fulfilled his prophecy, become a man. She expected him to come, after that. She waited for months, allowing him time to tie up loose ends, complete old battles. And yet he never came, never sought her out, never reached out to take a hold of a life together that could finally be theirs.

She had to know if it was true.

She's bundled up tight and she's holding onto a slip of paper with his address on it. She can't feel it through her gloves and she's already decided that the west coast is vastly superior to the east. The street is empty save for her and as she approaches the house, her first thought is that she can't imagine him living here. It looks warm and welcoming and cozy, all things he never allowed himself when she'd known him.

There's light coming from the windows, and one of them even has the blinds drawn up to give view to a clean, spacious kitchen. In the daytime, it would surely catch rays of the sun. Those things that used to scorch him could now warm his skin, maybe even make him tan, and that thought makes her smile.

It also gives her strength, but just as she's stepping forward into the yard, he appears in the window and her whole world goes still. He's aged, definitely, but well. That isn't what stops her heart in her chest. It isn't even the woman he has wrapped in his arms, although that does make her stomach tighten into painful, jealous knots. No, what strikes her hardest is what's in the _woman's_ arms.

A giggling, happy baby girl.

And she watches as he's kisses them both on the head, lets his hands sink to the woman's waist, and sways with her. They're dancing to music she can't hear, and a thousand questions rise with a thousand emotions she can't process and -

A twig snaps somewhere behind her and she spins around, stake practically jumping into her hand. It isn't a vamp that she finds, though something about the young man sets off an alarm in her head. But she sizes him up, and the more she looks the less threatened she feels. He's just a young man with a baby face and hair too long and eyes too blue. "Easy there," he says, hands held up in a peace offering. It makes him look even younger.

Still, you never can be too careful, and she narrows her eyes at him suspiciously. "Lurk much?"

He smirks, his eyes tease. "I didn't have to make a sound, you know. I was just being polite."

"Well, thanks for the consideration," she says, and looks from him to the window and back. There's something about this kid. Something in the way he moves, something in the way his eyes cling to the scene of the cheesy family bliss just beyond the glass.

"Who are you?" she asks. He doesn't answer, just moves to stand beside her and watch the house some more.

"He has a son too," he says finally. "I mean, another son."

It dawns on her then, the familiarity, the name of the boy she never met but often wondered about. He was never supposed to be possible, and yet - "Connor?"

He nods. "Buffy Summers, I presume?"

She returns the nod. She'd often wondered if they'd ever meet; sometimes in her dreams of a future with Angel, she would imagine that his son might visit his father, and she would be there too. She never thought they'd meet like this, skulking outside of his house as some other woman and some other child gets a happy ending meant for them. Mercifully, she notes, the little family has stopped dancing now.

Angel has put the girl in a high chair, and the woman's flitting in and out of their view, grabbing pots and lighting the stove.

The questions are many. "What's he doing here? And what are _you _doing here?"

"_He's _living his life." There's a moment in which Connor lets that sink in, then continues. "The Powers really did give it to him, in the end. But they never told him the catch. That he wouldn't really be himself anymore. They took his memories. All of them. The good, the bad, all gone. Made him a shiny new man, with his own past and future. And family."

Answers, finally. The reason he never came for her.

She's glad now that she stopped before she could knock on his door. She doesn't think she could stand being in front of him, within arm's reach, and not see recognition and lingering love in his eyes.

"His name's Seeley Booth now," Connor tells her.

She practically chokes on her surprise. "Excuse me? What kind of name is Seeley?"

"You tell me, _Buffy_."

Well, he has a point, so she'll make one of her own. "You never said why _you're_ here."

His joking demeanor gives way to seriousness, and it strikes her that perhaps he, like Angel, is too old for his body. Grown up too fast; she can see it in his eyes now. "I tracked him down a year ago," Connor says. "I needed to know, like you did. I hadn't meant to stay in town but..."

"But what?"

"But the vampires, they still know him. As Angelus, as Angel, whatever. They'd love to take him out now that he's human. He's not weak, but he's not super anymore either, and he wouldn't believe his eyes if he saw them. He wouldn't know to use a stake instead of a bullet. I've saved him a few times. His family, too."

Buffy remembers something Giles told her before she'd gotten on the plane, a curiosity he wanted her to check on if she had time. "I heard the vamp population here was down from last year," she mentions. "Significantly. We thought maybe a slayer popped up without us knowing but...was that all you?"

The smirk returns, along with playful eyes. "What can I say, I like having a night job."

Through the window, the family has settled in for a late night snack. He's leaning up against the counter, tasting spoonfuls of something and talking to the woman, and Buffy can see his smile from here. It's no longer tempered by pain of a life too long, his eyes no longer shadowed with past guilt. Though it hurts on some level, it feels like a privilege, to see him this way.

"Has he ever seen you save him?" she asks after a long moment.

"I make sure he doesn't."

The words tear through her, sudden and unexpected. "Don't you want to talk to him? Just try and see if there's anything left that knows you? You're his son."

Connor looks at her, very serious again. "I couldn't do that to him. Look at him. He's happy now. It's...it's what I want for him. In the end, he loved me enough to give me a good life. New memories that could fix me, make me feel more than just the pain. I think he deserves the same."

His logic is sound though she wishes it wasn't. Angel fought tooth and nail and soul for this. He saved the world. A lot. Now he's found a home and peace and family, even though it's not with her.

Connor's looking at her now with eyes of compassion and understanding. He's come to terms with this too, an entire year before she'd found her way here. If his own son can do this, she can too. She can walk away and let him live his life in the sunlight, live with the happiness and freedom he'd earned. She can do this because she still loves him, in that unbearable soul-deep way that will always ensure she puts him first, no matter what it costs her.

But there's one last thing she has to know.

"Connor?" she asks, finally tearing her eyes away from the family in the window to look at his face. In it, she sees something of his father. Angel's legacy. Angel's heart. "What's he do now? His job? I always wondered, if he had a normal life, normal choices-"

Connor gives her his first true smile of the night, and though neither of them know it now, his next words will give her the comfort and closure she needs to face a life without her soulmate.

"He catches bad guys, protects his family," Connor says. "He fights the good fight."

**A/N: This was brewing for awhile, possibly since The Ghost in the Machine. I don't normally do crossovers but I couldn't help but think - what if Buffy could see him now? And then I threw in Connor because I always wanted to know how that meeting could go down, and what better way for them to bond then by both coming to terms with his new life without them? It was just a fun idea to try out. Reviews greatly appreciate, as always!**


End file.
